Writer’s Strike Is Over, Woody Can Blog Again....

Well, the writers’ strike is over, and your favorite TV programs are to be returning to the tube in the next few weeks.

I’m sure, right about now, the writers are really hoping that you still remember what scripted entertainment is vs. all this "reality" crud that you’re being fed by the networks right now as a placeholder. Although, undoubtedly, the networks are hoping you’ll see things differently as they line up reams of nobodys hoping for their 10 minutes of reality TV fame.

Me, I really struggle with the whole TV thing. I love to watch sports and competition. And, yes, I admit to getting hooked into the occasional drama or sitcom. But, I have trouble with commitment; however, unlike a TV drama, I don’t think it’s me, I think it’s them!

I never got into Seinfeld, Friends, 90210, Desperate Housewives or any of the other mass-appeal, lowbrow shows. I don’t know what it is, it’s surely not some kind of elite snobbery. I just never got into them. I guess my tastes and humor are a little off the beaten path --no surprise there, huh?

Recent shows that I’ve locked onto are The Unit, The Office, Friday Night Lights and Big Bang Theory. Two of them are on their way up and two of them are on their way down.

Friday Night Lights, a football drama that was based on a movie that was based on a FANTASTIC book. The first few episodes--even the first season--showed a lot of promise. Hard-hitting action, for a while it seemed like there was a genuine attempt to capture the "behind the scenes" look at small-town football and a city that lives and dies by their team. It started out great, the characters had depth, the plot was driven by football and the cinematography was captivating. Well, it seemed that some exec thought there was too much football in a show about football and it didn’t appeal to a wide enough audience by limiting itself. So, hey, let’s cut down on the football and ratchet up the teen drama, right? Somehow, I’m sure somebody thought that would make the show accessible to everybody. But, in reality, all it did was cause it to lose interest from the people that were initially attracted to it by its uniqueness. The result: just another teen drama that NOBODY liked, and, no surprise, all indications were that they were going to can it. But, apparently at the last minute, DirecTV came to the rescue and wants to offer it OnDemand, and NBC will show the re-run a day later. Yeah, sounds like the kiss of death to me.

The Unit: WOW! This show was action-packed, hard-nosed and thought-provoking (wow, three hyphenated words!). This show was about a special operations army unit that worked in all the gray areas of government and military involvement that everybody likes to deny involvement with. This show kept you on the edge of your seat for the entire episode. It was fantastic. Well, guess what. Some exec got involved and decided that the show was confusing to people that like to shut off their brains when they watch TV. The show was violent and hey, shouldn’t there be some soap-opera like drama? Well, they reformulated the show, keeping one of the cast members home from a mission each week to participate in a sub-story line @ home drama, which took time away from adding any depth to the real plot. The result by the end was a watered-down action show that was being anchored by some at home soap opera. There’s plenty of shows out there if you want to watch @ home drama (see Desperate Housewives or Lipstick Jungle). But, you’ve taken the appeal out of another unique show to broaden its appeal. The result: Desperate Military Wives that people are fast falling away from and, no surprise, its return is questionable.

The Office: This show was just hitting its stride right before the strike. It is a mock-documenary about a fictional company in Scranton, PA with a bumbling staff and a hapless leader. Admittedly, I was confused by this show at first, but once you caught on to the nuances of all the characters, it became quite hysterical. It’s part live-action dilbert and part Hogan’s Heros. It’s dry wit is is driven by the akward leadership of Michael Scott (Steve Carrol). It’s got all the elements of office life and all the oddities that people deal with on a daily basis, and it shows them in a very funny light. The show is in the process of taking off, including an interactive website that involves fans in cast plots and embracing new media, including SecondLife. It’s an enthusiasts dream, BUT I’m concerned that it’s showing signs of influence of incorporating drama in the name of wider appeal. The "Jim & Pam" romance line is starting to dominate the show and take away from The Office aspect of it. The Result: the show will be back, and I’m hoping that this show rights the ship and gets back to "business."

Big Bang Theory: A geek’s paradise. It’s hysterical in its akwardness, yet intelligent in its interplay. The show is about a set of geeks who are intelligent beyond their own good. The geeks, along with their friends struggle to navigate the social maze of frienships, interpersonal relationships and even a love interest. The show takes place largely in the apartment of the two main characters. This show does have the potential of painting itself into a corner. There’s only so many akward social scenarios that can play out, but, hey, they’re highly intelligent, they’ll figure it out, right? I’m definitely looking forward to the return of this show. It’s witty, funny and makes you cringe all in a 30 minute package. The show was just hitting its rhythm when the strike hit. Hopefully they’ll be able to pick up where they left off.

Two and a Half Men: My how Ducky’s grown! This show is about a perpetual bachelor, his reluctant-bachelor, live-in brother and his savant nephew. This show’s got a great edge. The main character, Charlie, struggles to hold on to his days as a ladies man, while he reluctantly shares his beachfront property with his divorced brother Alan and visits from his son, Jake. The show is nothing groundbreaking, but takes a funny spin at some familiar old cliches. It’s edgy humor is still funny and fresh. An underused element of the show is the kid, Jake. The kid’s timing, facial expressions and dunce-like interactions quietly steer the humor of the show. For the most part, this show still has its edge and has kept things fresh. I think the show has struggled to amuse with Charlie’s behavior without the sometimes-character, Rose, who helped frame things for the audience. Still, I think there’s a lot that can still be accomplished by this show and I look forward to it coming back for some more mindless giggles.

How I Met Your Mother: The show is built around the premise of a father reminiscing his life’s story building up to "how he met their mother" story to his children. It doesn’t rely quite as heavily on narritive as The Wonder Years did, but it does use some narritive to help with the plot. The cast is built around Ted--the main character and his friends’ interactions. As far as formula goes, there’s the overly-happy couple, the ambiguous love interest couple and the insecure, well-dressed ladies man--played by Doogie Howser. The show’s funny as it relates to a group of people with varying levels of history together. There’s a good mix of characters on the show and a lot of fresh content. Because the show is built around a narrative to children, sometimes the comedy comes in the form of how potentially-adult situations are communicated. I think the writers wisely realized the trap of the ambiguous relationship and have wisely steered away from the cliche. I still think there’s a lot of good milage left in this show and I’m looking forward to having it come back.

Rules of Engagement: Another rather new show that’s caught my attention. It’s kind of like a mid-town Bundies show. You’ve got the husband a la Al Bundy who bemoans many of the cliche female routines of his wife. You’ve got the new couple down the hall a la Marcie and Jefferson. And, you’ve got the goofball convinced that he’s a stud a la Bud Bundy. It’s a fresh spin on an old formula. They’ve managed so far to keep it interesting--as I feel there was a lot of life left in Married With Children when it met its untimely demise. Except, in this case, they’re all living in the big city and they don’t have kids--thus elminating the angle of being bad parents (which was picked up by Still Standing). Despite the cliche nature of this show, they’ve kept it amusing with Puddy (from Seinfeld) and his reluctant affection for his friends and wife. Just one question...how the hell does David Spade keep getting parts? But, seriously, if this show comes back, I’ll still catch it when it’s on.

Whoa, did I get off track! This was meant to be a blog about how TV continues to wreck itself by watering shows down from what made them special into something with broad appeal that is exactly like everything else. Instead, it became Woody watches too much TV. I guess that’s what happens when you’re all messed up on Sudafed and sick as a dog. Anyways, the short story is: sometimes a niche show is a niche show. Stick to your guns, not everything on TV is going to appeal to EVERYBODY. When you try to make it for everybody, you’re going to take away what made it worthwhile to the people that appreciated the niche. Then you’re up against every other low-hanging piece of fruit on TV and you’re ultimately going to lose the small, nice audience you once had and get cancelled.

Time for more drugs....

Text Message Meltdown

Spend any amount of time talking to me or getting to know me, you're bound to figure out one thing about me--my phone is essentially an extension of me. No matter where I am or who I'm with, I'm usually sending or receiving a text message. It's my gateway to my friends and family.

How fascinating it is to be able to call together a group of friends for dinner or drinks. How cool it is to be able to share events and fun with your entire network of friends in an instant. No matter where you are, you can share. At the beach? At the Bar? At the Game? Somebody can't be there? Share a piece of the action.

You'd think this was a blog about my new-found fascination with texting. But, quite the opposite, I guess it's going on 5 years since I was bit by the text bug. Until recently, it just felt that cool that I was always tied in with the people I liked to have around.

I don't know if it's burnout or if the novelty is wearing off, but I've just kinda had it with texting. Much like being around me day-to-day, I'm sure there's things I say that rub people the wrong way. So, being an extension of me, it's only natural that similar behavior would radiate from my phone. But, lately, it seems that not a single message goes out without somebody bemoaning it.

Whaaaaa! You send too many messages. Boo hoo. You hurt my feelings. Woe is me. You pointed out the obvious about my favorite superstar. Or, heck, even ignoring the fun stuff. Whatever the case may be, it's lost its fun for me. I don't think I've ever texted anything that I don't say to people face-to-face when we're together.

So, I guess, sharing my fun, interacting as if we were all together and saying wish you were here has somehow become a lot less fun for me. Ting-a-ling.

The Great Kicker Quandary

Kickers kick, that's what they do. That's all they do. Game after game, practice after practice, NFL kickers kick the football. I understand that specialized shoes have been created and refined to help kickers specialize in their sport. BUT FOR CRIPE SAKES, CAN'T THEY GIVE THOSE POOR SAPS A SECOND SHOE THAT MATCHES THE FIRST TO DO THEIR JOB?!

Turkey Bowl and the Real Turkies

I participated in my first-ever Turkey Bowl Football event this last weekend. WOW! What a lot of fun. It was a great reminder of how much I miss being outdoors, running around in the name of senseless horseplay.

Life is so uncomplicated when you shut out all the other noise in your life and have nothing to do but keep your eye on the ball.

It's even better when you're out there sharing that experience with friends. We were all part of a joint delusion that we were all 12 years old again, drawing plays on our hands, plotting against our foes and full of boundless energy.

Of course, a quick look at the taped ankles, the snug-fitting flags, the folded over masses trying to catch their breath or watching any one of us waddling for a touchdown was enough to assure everybody that none of us was even close 12. But, if even only for a few flashes of greatness, it was worth...well...all of our weight in gold.

Afterwards, like a group of warriors--home from a successful battle, we all nodded our heads at one another with a satisfied grin--at least until we could catch our breath enough to talk about it.
The point becomes, it was an experience that we all shared together. A group dillusion. A simple, focused time together. A time that was balanced in its glory and embarassment. A reminder of what friendship is and how simple it can be.

I'll name each one of my muscle aches after one of you. I think there's enough to go around--at least twice. Happy Thanksgiving everybody!!!

Blinded By Green: NBC Got Snowed

Wow! Did Roger O'Neil, Brian Williams and the NBC TODAY & NIGHTLY crew get snowed on the story about ECO-Hangers.

As the story goes, Roger O'Neil reported about how a new recycled paperboard version of wire hangers were the new environmental answer to hangers. These new hangers were to provide a recycled/recyclable solution to wire hangars and help people and companies green their closets.
Last time I checked, hangers were made from steel, which is North America's 1 recycled material. Steel hangers contain a minimum of 28 percent recycled steel and are 100% recyclable at the end of their useful life. Dry cleaners reuse and recycle wire hangers on a massive scale. Additionally, hangers that might accidentally be thrown away by consumers are often automatically separated from the waste stream by magnets and recycled.

What's worse, is that this "green" solution is more expensive than wire--and is being sold to airlines and other companies as a more expensive investment to show they're "green." Bah. By sticking with steel, these companies were unknowingly green--and saving green.

Somebody didn't do their homework. They just wanted some quickie, feel-good green story to throw out there.

Bah!

McFoofy the new Steelers Mascot

I always thought the Steelers were one of the standards in football. They don't change their uniforms with every passing trend, they don't change their colors, and they STILL only have their logo on one side of their helmet. Why not? Because it's Pittsburgh, and much like Green Bay, the people live for Steeler football and the club simply does not have issues selling merchandise or putting tails in seats. I've been on the waiting list for season tickets approaching a decade (to put the ticket situation in perspective).

With Steeler tickets at a premium, and the Pittsburgh weather, you don't have to worry about people towing along toddlers that don't understand the game and need to be entertained by a mascot. And, I really don't think that the Steelers have ever had the problem of attracting "future consumers." But, for the sake of argument, I'll assume that they felt the need to do something to commemorate the 75th anniversary, and this mascot was the result of a collective marketing brain trust.

The look of this mascot is not awful. It gives a nod to the tradition and spirit of the Steelers. It conceivably could be "gritty." The Steelers have come to embody the knock-mouth, no nonsense, strong work ethic steel tradition of the city it represents.
So, it would only be natural that they selected a name that also upheld that grit and spirit that is Pittsburgh Steelers football, right?

Foofy McFoofy!?! Steely McWhatever...I can only hang my head. The name is shameful and whoever made the selection from 70,000 entries was giving little, or no, thought to the tradition that is the Pittsburgh Steelers.

I really hope that (much like the Steeler'ettes and the ill fated dance troupe of the 80's) this "Boy Named Sue" mascot quietly fades into an obscure object of future bar trivia.
(For the record- I submitted the name Iron Mike, as a nod to Iron Mike Webster who was the on-field embodiment of all things Steelers)

My Response To Pittsburgh's Drink Tax

When I bring people to Pittsburgh form out of town, there's always a common question: "Why aren't there more people in the city?" I usually offer the same explanation—the only conclusion that I can come to—Pittsburgh does not like people. People are apparently a necessary evil. Pittsburgh is like that expensive furniture at your grandmother's house that she keeps covered with that sticky plastic. It looks really nice these days, but you always end up leaving feeling uncomfortable and wonder who it's being saved for. Pittsburgh seemingly tolerates us enough long enough to gouge us during sporting events, but afterwards people can't get out of the city fast enough. And, that is true largely because of the financial and logistical constraints that our leadership have put in place.

I mean really, look at the welcome mat that Pittsburgh rolls out for us:

• EXTRA 1% SALES TAX: Why shop in the city—especially for major purchases—when you can buy the same item for 1% less just beyond the Allegheny County line? If the 1% County sales tax isn't enough to send you elsewhere, there's more…
• TRANSPORTATION: Just try getting to the city from the airport corridor. "You mean your only options are taxi or pay to park," I'm asked. From here, that's it. You could try to find a bus route, but the city is already cutting those back as well.
• PARKING TAX: I can only imagine that the city limits the modes of transportation into the city to feed its 45% parking tax. After all, the city was generous enough to roll that back from 50%. So, they have to make it up somehow.
• BUSINESS TAX: "But, shouldn't people work here," my friend wonders. Well, Pittsburgh, the "most livable city," I laugh once ranked 2nd with the most brutal business tax. I think we've slipped to 4th or 5th thanks to some other greedy cities. Why would anybody pay to put a business in a place that nobody can affordably get to, spend time in, or even work in...
• WAGE TAX: "Yeah, but it's the city, why don't more people live there," I'm asked. Well, you see, the normal wage tax isn't enough for the city. Residents of Allegheny County are charged extra. I'm not sure of the amount, but I think it's two-to-three times what we pay outside Allegheny County. (3% to be exact)
• OCCUPATION TAX: Oh yeah, don't forget the $100 off the top—occupational tax that the city charges people just for the privilege of working in the city. I mean really, what's another $100 to have the word Pittsburgh on your mailing address?
• EVENTS: "So, what's going on here in the city?" Well, we could go out to Burgettstown and catch a few shows. You mean there's no concerts here? Nah, they taxed the crap out of acts, now they just bypass the city. I go to Cleveland or Baltimore for most shows I want to see. You can catch a travelling production or eat, but the only reason younger people come to the city is the bar scene on the South Side. I wonder what they could do to mess that up…..BEER TAX!
• BEER TAX: So, let's put this in perspective. Pittsburgh has made it difficult to get downtown, charge you for parking once you get down there, charge you an extra 1% for anything you'd want to buy, and now they want to tax beer??? So, now on top of paying $6 for the privilege of drinking a beer in the city, they're thinking about adding a 10% tax to the beer.

A PARTING THOUGHT ON MY WAY TO THE SUBURBS: It's funny, I hear the grave concern in voices of our leadership. "We have a dying population." "We need to attract young people." Well, I'm one of those young professionals that you spend so much time talking about. I love the city, I love being in the city—especially when I'm in other cities. In other cities, I like not having to drive. I like being where the people are. I like being around business. I like the atmosphere of a busy happy hour of young professionals in a city where people aren't trying to get out of the city ASAP because traffic and the prices stink. But, that's not an option here in Pittsburgh. It's a mess and you're making it worse. The bar scene might well be one of the last veins of bringing young life into the city, and, effectively, you are saying, go play in the suburbs. It's less expensive and the parking is free. So, when I'm in Beaver or Washington County for happy hour, I'll raise a glass to you and your 10% tax.

Cheers!

WOODY